Wednesday, November 09, 2005

swearing & abuse - a short guide

with a little assistance from the br..

you cunty old bag
you shitfuckers
you dirty panty sniffing minger
cunt sniffing witches the lot of you
pack of cum queens
i hate you jerks so bad right now.. in teh face
jealous bitter old vinegar titted witch
manky cow
ah go piss on a fire hydrant
and (the cracker) why dont u piss off u big fat hairy lemon
unbelievable spunkerchief
cunting fucker
arsing bag of wank
sir wankalot
fat frotting cuntybollocks

i'm noticing a lot of cunts and wanking in the above list.
to be added to as and when.

a very nice lady has offered this point of view:

"I have been doing a simple semantic analysis of the words that the contributors to the Swearing thread have produced. There are 20 core words and the others are compounds, a core word and another word ie “dickhead”etc.
These 20 can be further subdivided into 4 categories:-
• Names for the sexual organs and associated body parts.
• Names for sexual activity and the results of it
• Terms for bodily fluids and solids
• A few uncomplimentary terms for women…dating I imagine from a time when men had the monopoly on using swear words…at least in public.
Anyone can draw their own conclusions for the preponderance of words in the above categories.

My own opinion inclines to the view that Anglo-Saxons and their descendants, by their choice of terms of abuse, indicate a profound disgust with the body and its functions especially in the area of sex activity and waste products.

Very much in keeping with our Puritanical Christian heritage.

I have been looking on the Net at Swearing in other languages...the only ones i can judge are French and Italian and they certainly do not reflect the same obsessions as the Anglo Saxons.

Italians seem to insult your mother rather than you.
Anyway just my 2 cents worth."

cheers for that, manu.

other gems that have come along include:

snow fanny (frigid hettie minger femme)
spunk monkey
monkfish (it's in the tone)
shit lips
ball sac
shit the bed
dirty ticket
scouser's fingers

the conclusion has been drawn, however, that the worst insult of em all is liar.


Blogger Career Break Guru said...

Hi Zoe

I found your site through my server log today (presumably something to do with B3ta which I mess about on periodically).

Just wanted to say how much I enjoyed your swearing article, especially the comments from your friend about the categories.

(Pachey on B3ta)

4:18 pm  
Blogger zoe said...

thank you rachel!
please feel free to direct other b3tans this way, and also contribute any obscenities you see fit

zoe x

4:32 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


6:36 pm  
Blogger zoe said...

ridikalous bollock-wagon too.

6:59 pm  
Blogger merrick said...

Before I go any further, I'd just like to say Twatneck, Fuckbucket, Shit Kebab, Beef Curtains, Nun Felcher, Wankstain.

That done, I'd like to recount a conversation with a friend who lives in the Netherlands. She reports that there's a very low incidence of sexual swearwords, and many english jokes that rely on double meanings of sexual swear words simply fall flat over there. Dutch swearing is largely to do with illness.

My friend has heard someone in the street shout an insult that translates as 'your dog is a cancerous nigger'. Nice.

10:55 pm  
Blogger *shattered star said...

I say skank a fair bit. Dunno why. Makes me wanna dance. And a good put-down for all occasions: suck-a-fuck. Maybe cuz it rhymes.

11:27 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


1:27 am  
Blogger zoe said...

heh excellent stuff. keep it coming (bitches)
shatteredstar - mm get the dance thing with skank too.
merrick - wow. at all of it.

10:54 am  
Blogger zoe said...

oooh and m, with a bit of fiddling you can come up with the fantastic insult:
you bunch of granny-rimming twatnecked fuckbucketed nun-felching wankspanners.
i'm very proud of that one.

11:36 am  
Blogger zoe said...

.....and, just in, we have...

"michael winner's knob cheese".


3:24 pm  
Blogger merrick said...

Check out the insult-by-text offer in the box at the bottom of Grim Rita 'Agony' Aunt's page

"You too can become a Grim Retard. Simply text RETARD to 88500 and receive two insults a week, to remind you of your unworthiness. Hopefully some of you will be so traumatized, you'll decide to end it all."


11:30 pm  
Blogger zoe said...

god, and i thought the crazy frog was a sign of the world going mad..

2:30 pm  
Anonymous John Heaven said...

I've produced a swearing guide myself, in PDF-Format. I would be obliged if an expert could have a look over it and perhaps suggest improvements.

It's to be found at (the actual link is here.

Thanks very much.

6:05 pm  
Blogger zoe said...

hey john heaven - you related to jim bliss? :)
your link didn't work, so i shall re-post it: here

fucking top guide, by the way!

10:34 am  
Blogger zoe said...

(and no, i can't offer any suggestions of improvement as i don't think any's needed).

10:48 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ucking red necks

2:17 pm  

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